escape artist vs hell on wheels

Who knew a 15 month old could cause such chaos in a house? Or could stop a mother's heart in two seconds flat? And I can't decide which is worse: escape artist Melissa or hell on wheels Melissa.....

Escape Artist Melissa
Melissa learned how to open a sliding glass door today. As in from fully closed door to a opening to the wide open spaces of the backyard. I had to piddle, hence I did not take Melissa with me. I have learned to pee like it is an Olympic race, a 15 month old unattended for two seconds equals trouble. Hence, the potty trip today probably took 1.4 seconds. In this time Melissa learned to open the sliding glass door and make a break for the open space out there. I come out of the bathroom and the house is too quite. I yell for her. Of course there is no answer. Where is she?? I find her in the backyard (which is fully fenced, thank God!!) sitting next to Harlee (our big dog) eating dirt happy as can be. She is in the FARTHEST corner of the yard. How can such little legs cover such a great distance in the 5 seconds it takes me to locate her??

Melissa hell on wheels
I am working and talking with a co-worker on the phone, while I load laundry into the washing machine. (Yes, multi tasking is a must to run this house, manage the kids, dogs, other pets, accomplish getting some work done and procrastinating my homework.) Melissa if course is in the laundry room/pantry with me. Much to my error I have stored food on the bottom shelf in the pantry. Of course it NEVER occurred to me Melissa would find great joy in knocking the food to the floor. Which is exactly what happened. Glass shattered EVERYWHERE!! I hang up the phone, in bare feet and get Melissa out of there. She has broken a jar of queso and a jar of salsa. While I get Melissa out of there and do the inspection for bodily injury the dogs discover treats on the floor! Harlee slurping up queso with the fastest toungue in the west cuts herself. I start to clean up the mess, put the dogs outside. While I am working on this, Melissa opens the sliding glass door AGAIN and makes another run for it! AHHHHH! Some of you might think, why not lock this door. Because that is beyond my cognitive abilities at this moment in time, OK?! I ended up calling a friend to watch the baby while I clean up the mess. And then all is well again in the Peterson household.

At least all is well because I put Melissa in her crib and told her she had better take a nap for her own safety :) Seriously, I adore her. I adore Caleb too. He just happened to be out playing while all this happened today. (Smart boy). I love staying at home with the kids, even on days like today when I think Melissa got all her demonic urges from Ron.

Melissa is not the only one in the family that has these days. I will try to remember to post the story of Caleb and the dead Sparky.